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Partners mental health

If you're concerned about, or care for, someone with mental illness
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Joined: Thu Mar 15, 2018 1:09 pm

Partners mental health

Postby slh89 » Thu Feb 18, 2021 6:06 pm

Hi guys
I'm really worried about my partner, he's struggling with his mental health and become quite a hermit... I have anxiety which is pretty high functioning in relationships anyway. We've only been together since November. Basically he stayed at mine for a few days in the new year (I have a two year old who he loves) it was very intense and like a fantasy initially and I even said to my friend that I can't believe how much he wants to see me and texts me so so much but it was lovely. We video tuned and everything. We got into a little routine seeing one another but it came to a grinding halt around three weeks ago. He texted less, made excuses not to see me, says he's poorly, the house is a mess, etc. This was on the back of me asking him to pull his weight a bit more while staying at mine. I WAS DOING EVERYTHING. I burnt out and cried saying please can you help more and he got defensive saying I hadnt asked for help. I got more anxious and he reassured me but then had an anxiety attack himself and said he's been feeling off for two weeks but I can't help but think had I not mentioned the helping me out none of this would've even happened? He has gone back on his tablets mirtazipine, which make him very drowsy but seem to have levelled out now. But, it's one thing after another excuse wise, we went two weeks while his tablets "worked" and his texting became infrequent due to sleep and doing art work. He got me a lovely present on valentine's but there's no stability, and when plans are made he nails and I'm left disappointed. I asked why he wasn't texting as much as I was worried but he said he's not on his phone as much die to his anxiety but I explained the change in contact had upset me and the fact he keeps bailing gets to me. I try to support and say how I'd love to see him but he doesn't seem interested or bails last minute. He says all the right things, but can leave me hanging all day without response but always says I love you. It just seems of it's something requiring effort he can't be bothered? It's frustrating as I fell in love with the guy I met in November. I don't get it. I feel hurt, turn and confused. Any advice appreciated

Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Mar 11, 2021 11:39 pm

Re: Partners mental health

Postby pinkfreud » Thu Mar 11, 2021 11:45 pm

Wow - that's a rough situation. I'm afraid I don't have any advice, just sympathy.

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