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How do you know when you need help?

For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
skel
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Dec 29, 2020 10:51 pm

How do you know when you need help?

Postby skel » Tue Jan 26, 2021 10:41 pm

Hi I've suffered with depression for over 20yrs now. I have periods where I manage ok (with medication), but have had a couple of breakdowns over the years too. I'm on the maximum dose of anti depressants and have been since my last breakdown.
I've recently lost a close relative, found out one of my children may have experiencd SA from an older child (don't want to go in to it, but she's very young and it's been difficult making sense of some if what she has said, but certain something has happened to her and now awaiting investigation outcome from social care as the other child isn't related or living here, as well as input from specialist services). I also have a chronic health condition which leaves me exhausted and in pain - often triggered by stress, so am feeling really unwell all the time lately. There's lots more going on too but I don't have the energy to type it all out atm.
But these last few days I've noticed how low I'm feeling. Wishing I was dead (although I have no plans and would not do anything because of my children - they are what keeps me here), but I feel so alone, isolated, feel like a complete failure and just wish I wasn't here anymore :( I hate feeling like this and keep hoping it will pass, but it just seems to be getting worse.
I haven't self harmed since I was a teenager but feel such string urges to now as it feels like the only way to get some release. Again I haven't done it, but the urges are there
I just don't know what to do anymore.
I'm reluctant to call my GP as don't want to go back on extra meds as I gained do much weight last time, I'm seriously overweight as it is and can't afford to gain any more! That's another thing that's getting me down btw - I hate how I look and how big I've got but no matter how hard I try the weight just wont come off :(

niamh90
Posts: 6
Joined: Mon Nov 23, 2020 5:27 pm

Re: How do you know when you need help?

Postby niamh90 » Thu Jan 28, 2021 4:32 pm

Hi Skel :) have you tried counselling? I really think it could help you talk about what`s causing these feelings if the anti-depressants alone are not helping. I am a health coach and we refer to a great service here, depending on where you live there will be some great help available to you, you may need to see your GP or nurse practitioner to get a referral. Please contact someone, you need to look after yourself as you would your children. You are loved and you are important. x


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