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Anxious about sexuality in music videos

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Anxious about sexuality in music videos

Postby justextremes » Sat Mar 21, 2020 5:30 am

My boyfriend wanted to watch music videos with me last night and I just couldn’t because I was paranoid about how sexualized the girls tend to be and I worried that he’d be more attracted to them than me. I wish I didn’t feel so alone in this. I’m really insecure to begin with, but it also just annoys me that everything has to be so sexualized and I always feel like I’m competing with these dolled up ladies in music videos and I never feel like I’m enough if he’s watching these videos. I know my boyfriend likes Selena Gomez and I like her too but I worry he liked her before because she does a lot of sexy music videos and I’m so worried that he would find her more attractive than me. Please help! My brain hurts from this.

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Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2020 1:58 am

Re: Anxious about sexuality in music videos

Postby erika154 » Mon Apr 06, 2020 5:21 pm

Hi lovely :) I saw your post in ""Phobia of boyfriend watching shows with sex and nudity in." I can relate so much to your feelings. In that previous post, there were two girls who were speaking about creating a WhatsApp groupchat for us to support each other. I emailed them yesterday evening. I am still waiting for their response.

I am still trying to figure this out. I am not sure where to start. But we may go through this together.

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Re: Anxious about sexuality in music videos

Postby rsxo » Tue Apr 07, 2020 7:20 pm

I doubt your boyfriend would ever consider leaving you or lose interest in you over these girls in videos. If that's the case, you dodged a bullet! Don't worry, you're okay :)
RSxo <3

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Joined: Sat Jul 18, 2020 3:30 pm

Re: Anxious about sexuality in music videos

Postby prycejosh1987 » Sun Jul 19, 2020 6:32 pm

You need to let the bird fly away and let it go, and it will come back to you after finding food.

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Joined: Sat Jul 25, 2020 4:23 am

Re: Anxious about sexuality in music videos

Postby anniexox » Sat Jul 25, 2020 5:03 am

Can relate. It can literally create an awful sinking feeling. Get someone who supports you with this, and not someone who rubs it in your face, otherwise it will exacerbate. I'm lucky to have a partner who understands I get like that, he makes sure he tells me I am loved and he only has ever had eyes for me (he never really got anywhere relationship wise before me) so I'm lucky that he sees me as his soulmate. He is very understanding of my mental health difficulties and knows it comes from empty silly thoughts.

Trust me, get someone who supports you, otherwise it just feels awful.
I do not know why we do this. I do believe it stems from extreme low self esteem. Take care x

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