Thank you for your reply.
The reality was that my experience with anti-depressants e.t.c. seemed to be outside the experience of the psychiatrist that I saw. To further complicate things, I am not sure he understood my predicament of being constantly exhausted and therefore not being able to hold down a job.
What was further exasperating was that I had been treated in London before moving here and I had been seen by the services here for 7 years, in all that time they did not think of sending for my notes from the Mental Health Services in London.
On each encounter with mental health services here I have been offered anti-depressants that I have already tried, the records of this would be in my medical notes in London. I wondered why they kept asking me to try meds I had tried.
I felt that the psychiatrist was trying to show me up as a patient who was not cooperative and not willing to try recommended treatments, this could not be further from the truth.
If I said I though at on occasion I thought he was smirking, others might say that it was my imagination and that as someone with depression did I think this was the case.
However, I explained that I had 'night terrors' when I went to sleep, no he said, this could not be possible, I was wrong about this. so we had a discussion in semantics on the definition of 'night terrors'. So now I get it, he needed to present as the Expert as the psychiatrist who was in charge and who knows all and I am the mad patient who couldn’t possibly know what I was talking about.
We tend not to do this, but in desperation I had to explain that I had two 'ologies' from tow separate universities, that I was not as ignorant as all that. Also there was my husband sitting there with an 'ology' to his name too.
I am a 50 year old woman, who is so exhausted that she can't hold down a job, you would think that someone, somewhere would have some sort of compassion and would want to help me in some way? Surely? Surely???