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life? TRIGGER

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myheadspacerace
Posts: 19
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2018 7:37 pm

life? TRIGGER

Postby myheadspacerace » Tue Sep 03, 2019 10:22 am

Hi, I have been diagnosed with schizophrenia, psychosis and depression. I have suffered from bizarre delusions and non-bizarre delusions. 17 years ago A bunch of people played on my bizarre delusions. This has caused me to experience gangstalking in the community. Also Some mental health professionals have a grudge against me because I tried to commit suicide to escape from this gangstalking and the cruelty I experienced from the hands of some Doctors and nurses whilst in Hospital which ended with a psychiatrist leaving their position and a nurses reputation besmirched. So, now every time I am at this hospital, for my treatment I get insults and inappropriate behaviour from the mental health professionals. So, now I need to have an outlet and so I try but no one seems to understand my schizophrenia and I am just presented with condemnation. This leaves me isolated. Even in Mental health community groups I am presented with condemnation. I feel that I have no real support at the hospital and that if I do open up the doctors will write it up as a new symptom of my illness and hospitalise me to satisfy their grudge. I cant even use helplines because of the gangstalking I get from my neighbours. I feel that it will give them a psychological edge over me. Over and over again my neighbours taunt me with their gangstalking. The comments they make soon take form in town of accusations and loaded language. So at the end of the day I really need a psychiatrist to trust, one that I could put forward my experiences and feelings that go with them. Is it too much to ask? Or have I destroyed my chance for this because of my vulnerability?

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