Hi, not sure if this comes under the general remit but know I'm getting worse.
Is it possible that a person can stop developing emotionally after an event like bereavement ?
I seem to be getting worse lately and just burst into tears through the smallest reminder of my dead parents.
This seems stupid as my dad died when I was 8 after a very sudden case of cancer which was over in about 6 weeks. I never got closure as I last saw him when the ambulance took him into hospital, and never again after that. I can't blame my mum as she wasn't to know he'd not be coming home. But I wasn't even at the funeral.
One thing that was a nemesis was that I saw an early symptom one day but he told me not to say anything to anyone, which I didn't. This I carried as guilt for about 30 years, when I eventually told my family that I knew, to which they said my dad did tell them about it !!!!
My mum has now passed some 12 years ago but I feel very fragile and as I said, burst into tears at the drop of a hat. I also have rational thoughts of suicide but it's only the thought of my 17 year old daughter being left in my position in years to come stopping me.
I've got a reasonably responsible retail manager job which I hold together but I'm not sure where to go from here, I'm a 53 year old guy but still feel 8 yrs old and really angry a lot of the time.