Search

Support Forum

SANE Support Forum

I need help!

If you're new and want to say hello...
maddie82
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 12:52 pm

I need help!

Postby maddie82 » Tue Jun 11, 2019 1:03 pm

Hi, I'm new here and i desperately need help. I don't know what to do anymore. I suffer with severe depression and anxiety and all i want to do is cry. I had some very traumatic events occur 3 years ago, lost my aunt, both my grandparents, all 3 of my beloved pets and almost lost my mum. My mum had a fall and broke her ankle. She didn't get the medication after surgery that she required causing 2 massive heart attacks and a massive stroke. She miraculously survived but she has lost speech and a majority of mobility. Me, my sister and father have been caring for her since which is very draining. I haven't been able to process all the loss and i haven't been coping at all. My anxiety is through the roof. I am married and my husband has been very supportive but i feel it is getting worse. My anxiety has my heart racing and i feel sick. I feel in a state of desperation and i don't know what to do :(

dundarach
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 8:20 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby dundarach » Tue Jun 11, 2019 8:25 pm

Hello Maddie, I've read your message and wanted to say that I came to this forum because I'm sick of spending hours wasting my life answering forum posts about the next prime minister and other pointless things.

What you're going through sounds very difficult and I just wanted you to know someone has read your post and is thinking about you.

It's not much but I hope you take some comfort knowing you've shared your troubles with someone who took the time to read and reply.

Please let me know how tomorrow is going. :)

maddie82
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 12:52 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby maddie82 » Wed Jun 12, 2019 8:59 am

Thank you dundarach for your kind words. I had some major anxiety attacks yesterday and it scared the hell out of me. It has never been that bad before and i didn't know how to deal with it. My husband helped me through it. He called me the moment he finished work to ask if i was OK, then he came home and held me, offering lots love and reassurance. He encouraged me to think positive and that if i feel another episode coming on to just keep telling myself everything is OK. I feel a little better today, although still a little scared and emotional but keeping myself calm.

jonnymiaow
Posts: 8
Joined: Wed Jun 12, 2019 3:56 am
Contact:

Re: I need help!

Postby jonnymiaow » Wed Jun 12, 2019 1:20 pm

Hey Maddie,

Have you tried a 'Grounding Exercise' before?

Basically when you feel the anxiety building, you have to try and notice;

5 Things you can see
4 Things you can hear
3 Things you can touch
2 Things you can smell
1 Thing you can taste

I hope you can know that it's okay to not 'be positive' too, it's a concept people without mental health issue normally say. Whilst trying to have a positive attitude can definitely help, being 'positive' when your mental health won't allow you to be, results in you 'hiding the negative' for the sake of others. Ultimately that's not helpful for you, it's for them.

I know it can be scary and you can feel weak, but you're really not. You're tougher than most people will ever know, or be, because nothing is more terrifying that battling with your own mind every day. Glad you've found this place to connect with others who experience similar, hope you can find some peace in your day today.

dundarach
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 8:20 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby dundarach » Wed Jun 12, 2019 7:38 pm

Good advice Jonny that sounds like an easy thing I'll do.

Glad you've the support of your husband Maddie.

Always here for a chat if you'd like :)

maddie82
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 12:52 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby maddie82 » Thu Jun 13, 2019 10:55 am

Hi Johnny, I haven't tried the grounding exercise before so i might try that if my anxiety gets bad again. Thank you for the great advice.

Hi again dundarach, i try to talk to my husband about what I'm feeling and even though he tries his best, he is not a therapist and i know he finds it a little draining sometimes so i try not to put too much on him. Talking helps though and i really appreciate you offering me an ear to listen to :)

dundarach
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 8:20 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby dundarach » Thu Jun 13, 2019 10:28 pm

Maddie

Sometimes just writing stuff helps and I'm popping in on an evening once the kids are in bed to read your posts.

We live in strange world where we can share things like this over the internet, however glad to listen.

Keep going, remember to give the hubby thanks for his support.

Also never be hard on yourself, never feel guilty or God forbid inferior. Sometimes life is hard for no reason, there's nothing which needs to be fixed and sometimes it's a case of doing what you can.

But if you're feeling down, don't compound it by thinking your unusual or daft, you're not, we all feel like this.

Take care, I'll check in tomorrow!!

katyia
Posts: 265
Joined: Wed Jun 12, 2019 10:10 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby katyia » Thu Jun 13, 2019 11:25 pm

hi Maddie

I could not think how to advise on this thread
but I have been very impressed with the other replies

and I also get drained by my family
so so hard when you are not well yourself ...

and I too am thinking of you x x x Katyia

dundarach
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 8:20 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby dundarach » Sun Jun 16, 2019 10:24 pm

If this thread makes us all realise the world isn't a horrible place and that people really do care for one another, then it's a worthwhile read.

I refuse to believe the world is horrible, it isn't, it's full of love.

Take a moment as others have already said, breath slowly and try to build up the small wonders around you.

Do keep coming back and letting us know how you're getting on.

maddie82
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2019 12:52 pm

Re: I need help!

Postby maddie82 » Mon Jun 17, 2019 9:56 am

Thank you everyone for your kindness. If i feel my anxiety coming i just take deep breaths and tell myself that everything is OK over and over. I have been thinking of this world as a bad place lately, especially with all the bad things that have been happening, but maybe its not that bad after all. There is allot of good. I think i have too many fears.


Return to “Newbies Room”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 15 guests