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Stressful job v mental wellbeing

Sometimes you just need to let off steam...
msg80
Posts: 3
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2018 2:39 am

Stressful job v mental wellbeing

Postby msg80 » Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:58 am

Funny I have sometimes wondered I wish there was a place I could just go online to let off steam.

Not sure what todays rant is about but basically in a bit of a pickle and trying to work my way through it and getting frustrated.

Really f***ed off about what someone said to me earlier this week. It threw my mood / schedule out. Yes I know what I need to do is learn to step back, rationalise etc. etc. but I'm not superwoman and can't do everything at once.

This week has been s**t. I got back from holiday on Saturday and while it was good I find sometimes it is unhelpful as I car crash in the week after.

Feeling incredibly anxious about work. I have a really stressful job and I am so worried I am underperforming. I've been putting in place strategies like I bought a two page a day diary, so I can have one page for work and one for home. I like writing and I like ticking tasks off so it will work for me better than the email calendar. It's still at the post office waiting to be collected and I need to transfer all the stuff across.

I realised recently that I am depressed. I signed up to online cbt and my homework is to write a schedule of my week including positive activities, then write down against it what I do. It has been giving me anxiety although writing this I am realising it doesn't need to be perfect, and I can start small.

I was meant to meet two friends for dinner but I had to cancel due to travel anxiety plus working late, so missed out on opportunity to lift mood. I was meant to see my brother tomorrow, he is ill so it is a bit draining and have decided to cancel that too. Not sure be very healthy to spend whole weekend alone but can't face seeing people.

I have also got to do some work over the weekend which is a bit rubbish. The only positive other thing would be going for a walk around the nature reserve which is always nice but done so many times before. Maybe I can have bath too, and read relaxing book when done jobs.

I think writing here is good because there is no pressure. The problem when you start telling people your problems is they ask if you are okay, or try and invite you things, or stop inviting you, all of which can make you feel worse when low.

Honestly the root of my problems are a massive health episode I had 18 months ago when I got diagnosed with something. My employer allowed me to work from home as a result but god it has been awful. The problem was my boss did it 'on the side'. If she'd done it properly through HR I would have been given a disability assessment and a plan to ensure well being. As it happens I've just been given one, which has steps in it I've written to ensure well being. Things like take lunch break, regular supervision etc. Problem is the isolation / depression has really set in over last year and now struggling to get into the plan. Don't want to mention depression in case they think I can't manage from home. Not really sure what to do. I think if I can follow the plan, do my CBT then working from home will be ok. But I'm fluctuating between these feelings of fear / low periods, and periods where it's ok. I was thinking about going to docs for medication but it said might take me longer to conceive online - although now I think about it that might only be while you are taking it. I think maybe I will go to my doc for medication, just because I need to give myself a break.

Ok rant done. Positive steps identified:

Make doc appointment to discuss medication
This weekend go for two walks, have a bath and read

Hope this place can help me over coming months while find my way back to well-being.

Night night, thanks for reading xx

capitalt
Posts: 171
Joined: Fri Apr 27, 2018 4:22 pm

Re: Stressful job v mental wellbeing

Postby capitalt » Sat Jun 02, 2018 9:17 am

Sorry to read your situation.
I used to home work and too found it somewhat isolating.
Is there any way you can get back to office based with reasonable adjustments, perhaps every now and then to meet your colleagues to help maintain rapport and a social circle ??

Good luck.

msg80
Posts: 3
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2018 2:39 am

Re: Stressful job v mental wellbeing

Postby msg80 » Sun Jun 03, 2018 1:16 am

Hi

Thanks for the reply to my rant, I know I'm not alone with the working from home thing being not all it's cracked up to be!

There are some options, there is a fairly local office but it's a case of turn up and see if someone's free desk. They used to have dedicated hot desks but got rid of them. The whole thing isn't very welcoming as you have to buzz and say why you've come to work there. Everyone has their own desks so you're sort of sitting with someone's old coffee cup, pictures of their kids and piles of paper. Then there's feeling like having to explain why there - I work from home and am coming for the interaction. I'd have get HR involved in sorting me a desk once a week, or just suck it up and go there.

The main office where I used to work is 1.45 hours by train so it's not practical. I go up once a month but I could make it twice. What's stopping me from doing that is that I've got out of the habit, and I've been procrastinating as it's quite expensive.

I'm sort of stuck between the two options. I do travel a bit for meetings and am on the phone a lot, although it's not the same as the office banter.

The plan is to start some evening group exercise so like to see how that affects the balance.

c.j.
Posts: 81
Joined: Fri May 04, 2018 2:43 pm

Re: Stressful job v mental wellbeing

Postby c.j. » Tue Jun 05, 2018 9:10 am

Hope the exercise goes well. I'm moving offices soon, so hoping there's fewer people with extremely annoying habits there. Can't cope much more of the current situation.


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