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*trigger* I'm ready to go

Sometimes you just need to let off steam...
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2020 10:53 pm

*trigger* I'm ready to go

Postby nohopeleft » Mon Feb 17, 2020 11:01 pm

On the 7ths I was spiked and woke covered in bruises and bite marks
Police are involved etc... But I am suicidal I have told the crisis team about
How strong these feelings are and have been brushed off time and time
Again.. Today I have finally accepted there is no help.. No1 actually cares
If I live or die... I have all I need to fall asleep and never ever wake up
I have over 150 10mg morphine pills and over 200mls of of oral morphine
I have my note written.. So tomorrow I plan on acting OK get discharged from the
Crisis team go into the park Woods take this and just drift off...
I will finally be at peace

Posts: 3
Joined: Tue Feb 18, 2020 2:15 am

Re: *trigger* I'm ready to go

Postby bec71 » Tue Feb 18, 2020 2:41 am

please dont, how are you feeling at the moment

Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Feb 17, 2020 10:53 pm

Re: *trigger* I'm ready to go

Postby nohopeleft » Tue Feb 18, 2020 2:45 am

I have tried soo soo hard to access help but it's been thrown back in my face by the so called crisis team.... I'm drowning and I can't find a way forward.. I actually feel more at peace knowing I won't have to be here much longer

Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Feb 20, 2020 5:58 am

Re: *trigger* I'm ready to go

Postby jessicajay » Thu Feb 20, 2020 6:55 am

I hope I'm not too late with this reply, but please don't kill yourself.

I can understand that you feel suicidal and you have been let down by the people who should help, but if you are dead it's the end of any good feelings as well as bad ones.

I don't know how to articulate this, but you say you feel more at peace having made the decision - can you try to keep the peaceful feeling by acknowledging your determination to kill yourself, but putting off the action? (I say this because I have been depressed off and on for over forty years and as long as I have a death plan I can hang on through the worst of times).

I don't know what else to say, but please at least reply and tell me I'm daft - that way I'll know you are still alive.

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