Hi there I hope anyone can help me, or advise me, I am desperately looking for some counselling for my partner and I. I have tried Mind, Relate etc. but to no avail. She suffers from depression and is already currently in counselling for this twice a week, but her depression is affecting our relationship very badly, she is angry all the time and I seem to trigger her anger by saying the wrong things (not intentionally) for which she blames me for and she has terrible screaming outbursts (non violent) but vicious, terrible name calling, once she sees red I cannot seem to stop her and she tells me I can't deal with her outbursts and I don't know what to do, which is true, I try not to say anything but if I do say something it's wrong and the anger is two-fold directed right at me, it's like witnessing a different person. She is telling me we should split up, we had 2 months apart in the Summer due to a bad row, then we came back together which was wonderful, but now they are again getting more and more frequent again, I don't want to split from her, but I am finding her anger getting more and more vicious.. she says I cause her anger I don't help her, I'm not good for her, I just don't know what to do anymore, I never start the arguments and they crop up when I least expect them. Sorry if this is rambling but I am very stressed and upset, her last e-mail to me was very upsetting and was just sentences and sentences about all the things I 'don't' do for her and that she can't trust me anymore. I don't know what to do and I need help, it's knocking my confidence greatly as all she does is tell me how awful I am to her, (which I'm not) I just don't know what to do in her rages, she tells me I don't learn and I'm not doing anything about it, but I don't see her working on her anger either.. it's a no win situation and I am starting to resent her and the anger myself is building up because I feel repressed and can't answer her back all I seem to do is defend myself, rather pathetically..
Thank you for listening.