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How are things progressing Isap

For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
deb1960
Posts: 1840
Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2016 8:14 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby deb1960 » Tue Apr 23, 2019 12:09 pm

Hi Isap

I'm not surprised you're feeling desperate. I wish I could say something of help.

I hope your lawyer finds a witness. Over here the situation would have been cleared up years ago as you know.

Nothing of consequence but I just read in my local paper that my retired doctor was arrested and spent a night in prison due to protests on climate change. She was a wonderful doctor and helped me through so much

God bless
Debs xx

Isap
Posts: 1843
Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2015 1:13 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby Isap » Thu Apr 25, 2019 1:45 am

Just lost a really long post will have to try again later

Isap
Posts: 1843
Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2015 1:13 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby Isap » Thu Apr 25, 2019 2:54 am

Hello Debs

Isap
Posts: 1843
Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2015 1:13 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby Isap » Thu Apr 25, 2019 3:32 am

Hello Debs

A retired doctor who takes part in a climate change protest can only be a wonderful person. Why are there so few like her?

My witness showed up!. I thought she did a great job. My lawyer said it was a disaster and was shouting at her afterwards. This was one of those rare moments where instead of getting depressed, I had a moment of truth, that it was my lawyer who was keeping me in this dreadful state. She used to be good but changed after her partner was shot dead. Now negative, pessimistic, talking to me like I am convicted for life already. The girl witness forgot the names of two bars I had taken her and her friends to, but had in her written stat0ement made 4 years ago. A fellow prisoner there, policeman with rape accusation, said that was no big deal and in any case, what mattered was her describing my character. It's too late to change lawyer and only one hearing and character witness left. Lawyer is actually guilty of taking my money and not preparing the witness properly but the fact my witness made mistakes I thought made her look more honest because non scripted, all this happened a long time ago and she had forgotten minor details, same as I had. The prosecutor gave her a chance to correct re. the bars and didn't ask her any horrid questions. What's your impression having read this?

While in court, I witnessed something shocking. A man had raped a 7 year old girl. He was able to change his plea to guilty, pay the mother there and then about £300, and convicted just 3 years on lesser charge of serious assault. I've been in prison nearly 5 years having committed no crime, but "intending" to commit one. It's totally absurd. Child rape must be really common in this horrid country, probably less than 10% of cases make it to court. It's "look at what those nasty foreigners do in our country, we'd never do such a thing" when serious crime is endemic here.

When I got back to my dungeon, I heard squeaking noises under my bed and found two newly born kittens. I had no choice but to throw them out. Then the mother came back and had three more. Cats here keep rat population down but become the new vermin themselves. The mother cat was one I had been feeding scraps to who lived just outside my cell and sometimes came in by climbing up through the gaps in the metal gate. Cats just like the people here, you help them and they exploit you for it.

Regarding my medications, I can't come off quetiapine anti-psychotics because they're the only thing that work. It's possible that an overwhelmingly hopeless life situation can overpower the effects of ADs but I'm going to try an atypical one called Tramazone or something like that once my brother in law has seen his nice pharmacist. Convincing the psychiatrist won't be hard unless she is an expert on that particular drug.

Hope you are well.

God bless

Chris (my real name)

Isap
Posts: 1843
Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2015 1:13 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby Isap » Thu Apr 25, 2019 7:13 am

Hi Debs

Damn it there's always something to worry about here whether you got GAD and depression or not.

About 10 days a mobile x ray unit came to the jail. I thought it was for teeth so signed up but was for lungs. Today my Danish cellmate was told he had TB and that one of us had to move out for two weeks.

The overcrowding in all other cells not to mention obnoxious prisoners is so bad that we both refused and I signed a waiver saying I understood the risks in staying here. I'd rather get TB than spend 2 weeks with 150 other prisoners.

Found two more kittens and threw them out into the area the mother frequents. She picked one up in her mouth then ditched it. I know you're a dog person so probably this isn't very intetesting.

I've been unusually hyper these past two days. As far as I know I'm not bipolar, it's GAD leading to neurotic depression. I don't think I've ever said that.

God bless

Chris

deb1960
Posts: 1840
Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2016 8:14 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby deb1960 » Thu Apr 25, 2019 9:13 am

Hi Chris

Well my impression is that the witness is relating the incident truthfully, ie that the prosecutor knows this. Her character witness must be important so surely that will be taken into account. Having a dreadful lawyer must be awful but surely that won't go against the verdict. Sorry that I can't give a better impression. Many years ago I had to speak to a friend's lawyer. I was very truthful and the lawyer told my friend that I hadn't been any help. The issue was such that it didn't really bother me.

Child rape? My views on that are extreme.

I love cats and all creatures. Cats and dogs are so often good friends and years ago I had a cat that played chase with my German Shepherd. The cat was always in charge. I live near a main road so can't have a cat now. My love of animals, put briefly; I am the saviour of spiders in the bath.

I love many people but hate the human race. I think most people are corruptible hence I mix with people who are broken like me. We're not capable of greed or seeking power.

I will write more later.

God bless
Debs xx

deb1960
Posts: 1840
Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2016 8:14 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby deb1960 » Thu Apr 25, 2019 9:16 am

Btw. That post comes across as brisk. I get quite stressed using technical stuff and so try to be quick. Sorry about that.

Isap
Posts: 1843
Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2015 1:13 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby Isap » Fri Apr 26, 2019 3:45 am

Hi Debs

There was nothing brisk or wrong with your post. Just keep them coming!

God bless

Chris

Isap
Posts: 1843
Joined: Fri Feb 06, 2015 1:13 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby Isap » Fri Apr 26, 2019 7:36 am

Hi Debs

Actually your post was very good. The fact the witness made mistakes actually makes her come across as more truthful. People make mistakes, especially when nervous. Many witnesses just respond the way their lawyer has briefed them to from what I've seen.

I didn't like the way I had to dispose of the kittens, throwing them outside, buy I had no choice. There are too many strays here competing for food. Last night the mother came back twice with the same kitten. the noise such a tiny creature can make would drive a lot of people crazy, that high pitched squeaking. and noise has been my biggest problem here.

My cellmate was transferred to the infirmary cell today for two weeks. After that and taking medication the TB is no longer contagious. There is a cell for TB prisoners but it's like a pig sty and the inmates terrible so this was a good compromise for us both.

Today is a Tramadol day and the third day that I haven't felt my usual absolutely awful. It's possible the venlafaxine has started to kick in, but I don't want to speak too soon.

God bless

Chris xx

deb1960
Posts: 1840
Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2016 8:14 pm

Re: How are things progressing Isap

Postby deb1960 » Sat Apr 27, 2019 9:04 am

Hi Chris fu

I hope your tramadol is giving you some peace. I hope too that the venlafaxine is helping.

Because psyvhiatrists have tremendous belief in talking therapies meds are given sparingly. My friend was on mirtazepine for ages before it helped. What I'm trying to say is that your venla... is perhaps doing it's job slowly.

I think I would have stayed in the same cell as the TB guy given the alternative. The action regarding this situation sounds quite humane compared to their usual attitude.

Your visiting cats situation would distress the hell out of me. As I said i love animals more than most people.

What I go through is nothing compared to you but the up and downess does my head in. The Samaritans are very different from years ago. They make a very good sounding board and never suggest answers. Quite honesty they're better than most counsellors though very few use them given the old idea that you must be desperate if you contact them.

Take care and God bless
Debs xx


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