upwards-is-the-aim wrote:Look lets say you are ugly - maybe that is true maybe that is not - and at the end of the day there is no fixed definition of beauty or ugly
You come over well on the forum - except you are on a downer about your looks
So maybe it is not looks but aspects of your personality face to face
Maybe you come over as desperate or needy
That's fair, looking desperate is something I'm certainly aware of now, that I was definitely guilty of in my early teenage years. I'm reminded of the old college saying: "If you look hungry, you'll starve." I genuinely feel relaxed around most people, and I certainly don't think I try-too-hard in such situations.
However, when presented with a photo of me, and seemingly every woman online saying "no" based on just the photo, I'm struggling with the idea that the problem is that I think I'm ugly, or that I'm coming across too needy. I don't even get to be needy, as the door is closed on me, if you will.
Sit in a cafe a look at all the couples walking by - are they both beautiful or are there IYHO some ugly ones that have partners
You are a package of things
Oh sure, I'm not pretending no ugly guy has ever landed a girl. I mean, statistically speaking, every single one of my ancestors has gotten laid, right?
But seeing other people in relationships doesn't help me, because they're not me. Hearing how someone struggled as a teen but is now married to a gorgeous woman does nothing to affect my situation. Even people who I (personally) see as less attractive than myself have done better than me.
How do you get on on dating sites where you show no picture or use a picture of someone else
Or just the back of your head
Okay okay - but do it/something/anything
Interesting point, I have asked, ney, begged friends of mine to use their photos on my profile, to prove to them that I would get more likes/swipes/matches with their face, but my friends were not receptive to this idea. To reverse it, I suggested maybe they downloaded Tinder on their phones, make a profile describing them perfectly, but use photos of me, and try to get dates. I kinda figured it would help them walk a mile in my shoes, if you will, but they also refused to do so.
Register on a USA site and see how the chat goes
I mean, I'm British, so I'm not quite sure what that would achieve.
There are lot of lonely people looking for sort of none dates but chats online etc
Maybe try giving them a go and step back from this I am ugly and no-one wants to be with me and it is all that matters
And see how you get on - with less pressure your self to achieve a girlfriend / dating set up
Hey, I literally have no problem making friends, I started doing the meet-ups this year and everyone's friendly, I made friends very quickly, and that's great, but it literally does not help with the problem I have.