I have been feeling a lot worse the last few months.
A month ago I was feeling extremely low and one night I had a massive panic attack while I was out and next thing I was found trying to jump off a bridge.
Since then the thoughts and ideas have been floating around my mind endlessly and I have been having strong urges to attempt something again.
Tonight was the closest I have been since that night a month ago. Overdosing has been on my mind a lot however I have never planned on doing it. Tonight, though, I had the pills in my hand ready to take them. I managed to stop myself by self-harming instead. Feeling extremely desperate and panicky as I still feel out of control and as if I am going to do something worse than just cut myself.