I'm new here and I joined because I feel friendless and alone. I have been suffering from depression for years now and it has gotten worse this year as I had to suffer through consecutive heartbreaks, one of which included death of a loved one from cancer.
I have been becoming increasingly anti-social lately and talking to people online is the only time I feel able to fully show my real self. I feel so sad all the time and have no desire to eat or will to do anything except go to work - I'm a nurse - and because my family relies on me to keep things together here as we are in dire financial circumstances. Sometimes I go to work without eating or sleeping. I think the only thing driving my will to survive is just the concern for the emotional and financial state of my family if I were gone.
I have suicidal ideations but I know I would never go through with them and for some reason that makes me even sadder.