Thank you for the your replies. I just wanted to feed-back that my week alone was a surprising success. Usually I just sit at home in the dark waiting to burgled or attacked..not surprisingly this is a) not much fun b) pretty pointless and c) makes me so anxious that I become hysterical.
Not this time...armed with your messages of support. The first break-through came on the very first night when I got home from work. I noticed that the pond pump was broken and the filter was all clogged up. Normally I don't have to worry about the pond, because my other half takes care of it...and although I love the garden previously I would avoid being in the garden alone...but I couldn't leave the fish like that...so I set to work...I was so focused I didn't worry about being alone, I felt a big sense of achievement that I fixed the pond pump and I was happy that the fish had a nice clean home.
During the week I met and enjoyed a meal with some nice new people..and even had a couple of drinks...again I would normally avoid situations like this, like the plague...because they just make me feel too anxious.
I decluttered two recycling boxes of old papers and magazines.(i'm glad the recycling boxes were hungry
)..i'm such a hoarder I can't usually bear to throw them out, and have been known to retrieve items from the bin. Usually I find the whole decluttering process..so stressful that I just give up...but last week I just seemed so much able to just let these un-needed papers and magazines go...and I feel so much better now that they have gone.
I've been cooking, relaxing, and got on really well at work...I know feel more confident knowing that I CAN cope. My boyfriend is thrilled, he left a hysterical blibbering wreck only to find that I had transformed into a much happier other half. My efforts were rewarded with a beautiful pair of earrings...when I wear them I can be reminded of how far i've come.
Sorry about this long post, but I really can't thank you guys enough....I feel like i've been dead for a long time...and i've finally got my life back
Finally jdxxx even though I enjoyed your suggestion...i'm comfortable listening to naff music, dancing like an idiot and singing cheesy tunes into my hairbrush...so I substituted watching all my favorite guilty pleasure telly programmes instead,