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feeling crap warning trig

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wheeliknutz
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2011 1:04 am

feeling crap warning trig

Postby wheeliknutz » Sun Feb 13, 2011 2:46 am

hi,
not sure if this the right place to post this but here goes, ive been dx with depression anxiety disorder,bpd and eating probs im also a self harmer. i have got to the point i dont know where to turn anymore, after poor treatment from my local psych unit and crisis team i asked to set up a meeting to sort the problem, but nobody took any notice and was advised to make a complaint wich i was unwilling to do but after 7 months of trying to talk to the trust about this my cpn decided that we had no other choice. the problem i have now is im in a state and everywhere i try and access help nobody wants to know.my cpn knows how bad things are and wanted crisis to do an assessment.well had a phonecall from them today and was basically told get out the house(cos i havent left the house in 3 weeks), have something to eat and try and sleep. they know that i have managed an hours sleep in 8 days so found this advice helpful, not. im extremely anxious and am having a hard time trying to cope with hallucinations and disassociation this has left me feeling very suicidal again. so there next suggestion was to get in my car for a drive. i spoke to a gp who told me to talk to the cmht who advised i speek to crisis, they then told me wait til monday and try to speak to my cpn and wait till fri till i see my psych. i know ive had my ups and downs over the years and have a checkered past, but i havent been this bad for about 14 years(it was just severe depression over a year ago)im worried im going to end up psychotic again as this is how it starts. i know how my head works and have been trying to seek help since nov,but everyone wants to pass the buck, now im feeling there is no point anymore and just spend most of my time wanting to kill myself and others.i cant leave the house as im terrified ill lose my temper and flip.i even rang the samaritans and was told ring the crisis team and they hung up. feeling theres no point anymore and really want to end it all, i have physical problems too that are not being dealt with and am being made to feel that im a nuisance.youre always told get help when u need it but when u do noone gives a s***.before this i had a good gp who has since retired when i asked for what normally helps was told no by the new one. got such a lecture i havent been back to the docs. thing is my head now telling me theyre right and i should just kill myself but frightened i wont be successful.just dont know where to turn or what to do anymore losing my grip on reality. ty for reading and sorry if ive put anything i shouldnt

wheeliknutz
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2011 1:04 am

Re: feeling crap warning trig

Postby wheeliknutz » Tue Feb 15, 2011 2:29 am

hi bobstar

my cpn has been really good she knows exactly what state im in and is trying to get me help, but the home treatment team refuse to work with me(due to problems i had with certain members of their staf 15 yrs ago), and crisis are passing the buck too they say i need to talk to cpn and psych.just cant cope and due to last " chat" with crisis feeling totally out of my depth and was made to feel totally insignificant think some of the problem is due to a complaint i have put in regarding last treatment. also doesnt help having "hostile, difficult and aggressive" written on my notes.but then if u end up psychotic u dont tend to be the nicest of patients. but for the mo i still hanging on but not sure how long i can keep it up, i was upset and angry about it but now just in the dont care anymore frame of mind . ty for your reply.

wheeliknutz
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2011 1:04 am

Re: feeling crap warning trig

Postby wheeliknutz » Tue Feb 15, 2011 7:59 pm

hi dragonfly

sorry to hear you not feeling good either, but thanks for your post i think it is awful how mh services treat us, and unfortunatelty im not alone. think it totally unfair how mh service users can be so patronised and disregarded by those who are supposed to help us. when youre feeling s*** the last thing you need is the **** they dish out to you.hope things improve for you soon dragonfly tc


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