Sir Hugo, I'll either take the red pill or the blue one

[maisi]

Hi, if there's a dungeon master about, I've laced up my boots and would like a challenge. And am definitely not scared, I always walk this fast.

[sirhugo]

Enter stranger. Put on the helmet of justice

I have two games going right now. Would you like the zombie apocalypse? Or would you like to be homeless on the streets of Glasgow?

[maisi]

Why take the easy route and play about with zombies? Homeless, Glasgow, it will be a damn sight less funny than you and attmp though. Give me a minute to pack my bag and sell the helmet to an antiques dealer.

[sirhugo]

Well I will do my best to give you a few shits and giggles

the game starts now. good luck dungeoneer

The rain lashes the streets on a Friday night in Glasgow city centre. You stumble along Sauchiehall street, miserable, starving and soaked to the bone. You have been homeless for six months and you haven't eaten for three days. You were kicked out of your last home because you spend all your money on alcohol and neglected to pay any rent. You have officially hit rock bottom. But at least its all uphill from here. You're first task is to find some shelter from the rain.
Soon one of Glasgow finest pubs appears before you

Do you want to go in here?

Or keep looking for shelter elsewhere?

[maisi]

(not the pub, not the pub, not the pub) I'll keep looking, and hopefully avoid being your shortest ever game.

[sirhugo]

You walk away from the pub and get stabbed in the face by an armed mugger. you are dead

just kidding don't worry if you do die well just start again

Everywhere else is closed at time of night. You find no other shelter and have to backtrack to the pub you found earlier. Due to the cold you lose 2 HEALTH points. (There are lots of stats to keep track of. Don't worry, I'm tracking them for you )

The pub is full of Glasgow finest citizens. Yeah right its 11pm on a Friday night. Looking like a utter deadbeat means you fit right in

Will you try to sponge some drinks from the bar patrons?

Or will you sit quietly in the corner?

[maisi]

Jesus christ Hugo! Was that cos I sold the helmet of justice? Well I think atttmp sat quietly, and there are nutrients in beer, so I'll try and cadge a drink

[sirhugo]

Yes how dare you sell the helmet of justice!!!! that was my childhood teddy bear

All your best efforts to skadge some drink get you nothing than a punch in the face, and thrown out by the bouncers for being a nuisance. Lose 2 HEALTH points. (HEALTH now at 6) At least its stopped raining. Now its time to find somewhere to sleep tonight.

will you sleep in the park?

or sleep in the bus shelter?

[maisi]

I am extremely sorry about that, if I get out of this alive I'll knit you a new one.

Ah, should have known the pub wouldn't be full of kindly old farmers sharing tales and free pints. The park sounds wet after the rain, it's got to be the bus shelter.

[sirhugo]

ah the rain. that's a factor I forgot to consider

Glasgow is not full of kindly old farmers. kindly old junkies and murderers maybe

You make your way to your regular haunt, Buchanan Street Bus Station. You settle down on your usual bench and try to sleep. However, a group of drunken youths are disturbing you with there loud obnoxious behaviour

will you tell them to take a long walk off a short pier?

or will you ignore them?