That sounds like a really hard situation, I really feel for all of you. I know how scary it can be not bowing if you can keep a loved one safe and at the same time really empathising with the torture that’s going on in their head.
Sadly I know as well how useless the nhs mental health services can feel, especially the crisis team. The waiting and the box ticking and then the paltry help that might eventually come, it’s a disgrace.
When my partner took an overdose last year his meds were looked after by his parents who live nearby. Unfortunately that created a situation where his relationship with his mother suffered as it became all about the meds. I imagine it could be putting some strain on your daughters relationship with her husband, so maybe you could talk to him about it? T sounded perverse to us at the time but the psychologist suggested that an element of trust was needed eventually to help us come out of that dynamic, although my partner doesn’t have bipolar and of course is a different person and so much of this rests on the individual. It’s probably a good idea for you to cultivate some kind of supportive relationship with her husband anyway, if you’re not already. I’ve found it really helpful being able to talk to his mum and sister.
Is private therapy an option for your daughter? Is she part of any support forums herself? I’ve found that when it comes to the nhs, it’s a battle because everything is so underfunded so you kind of have to be prepared to keep nagging. Sorry I know that’s probably not the positivity you need.
Have you thought about any counselling for yourself? It could really help to get some support in that area, so you have somewhere to offload and look after yourself. Or family counselling? It may help you all to communicate and support each other through this? I can’t imagine how worried you must be but do try to take care of yourself- if for no other reason than to be able to support your daughter.
Hope that’s helpful. Xx