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Husband depressed and won't seek help

If you're concerned about, or care for, someone with mental illness
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Joined: Thu Jan 04, 2018 9:02 pm

Husband depressed and won't seek help

Postby resmith76a » Thu Jan 04, 2018 9:36 pm

Hi, I'm new to the forum. Really looking for some advice regarding my husband and my options.
We have both suffered from depression, I have sought help and I thought I had it fairly under control with medication until this evening however my husband is really struggling. He also suffers from severe back and neck pain, COPD and a skin condition. He says he is in constant pain, when he was seeing his GP she prescribed various pain medication including ora-morph and nothing has helped. He rarely leaves the house because of the pain he is in and has no support from his GP now, he has requested a change of doctor within the practice he is in and they have refused so he's basically refusing to go anymore. He has said he wants to end his life a number of times but so far not tried to. I'm trying to be supportive, I work full time, do everything and am also fighting my own battle with the illness. It got to the point this evening where I snapped and told him he has to get help and that I am not sure how much longer I can keep doing this. He was on antidepressants himself but stopped taking them and won't start again. I know my outburst was not constructive or supportive so I turned to the internet for help and here I am. Most of the sites I have found basically say it is a medical emergency and I should call 999 but I don't think I can, I'm not in a good place myself at the moment and am sat here in tears typing this as I really don't know what to do for either of us.

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Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2017 4:12 pm

Re: Husband depressed and won't seek help

Postby rsxo » Fri Jan 05, 2018 11:38 am

Hi resmith76a,

Really sorry to hear that you're both going through this. It sounds like it is getting really bad, and the GP doesn't seem to be working. I think it is a good idea to call the emergency services - calling 111 will probably tell you to see a GP, so 999 is a sensible idea. I hope you both feel better soonx

Much love <3
RSxo <3

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Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2018 10:14 am

Re: Husband depressed and won't seek help

Postby alandal » Wed Jan 10, 2018 10:43 pm

I have been in a similar situation before with my husband. Changing of medication, being fed up with lack of progress and expressing a desire to kill himself. At these times you feel so helpless and scared so I really feel for you. On these occasions I have called the Samaritans justvfor someone to talk and cry to, it just sort of clear your head though no practical advice is offered. If you feel he is in immediate danger of hurting himself I would suggest to him that maybe you go to a&e in that why they may also point you in the direction of better treatment as the GP seems to be an issue for your husband right now. Don’t berate yourself for your outburst and snapping you really must be going through a lot as well as working full time- I hope you have been able to find some time to yourself to have some rest as well.

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