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Saying No.

If you're concerned about, or care for, someone with mental illness
stressed
Posts: 231
Joined: Tue May 24, 2011 8:59 pm

Saying No.

Postby stressed » Sun Jan 06, 2013 12:47 pm

Today is going to be incredibly tough for me.

I know my brother who I love with all my heart, is going to phone up and ask me to give him money again.

I am going to have to say NO! and mean NO!

My brother is hugely important in my life...and of course I still want him to be in my life..and I do want to continue to help and support him, if I can.

I just want this year to be different to the last 20 years...and for that to happen...something has to change.

I don't want my brother's schizophrenia, and various addictions to dictate my life anymore.

I want to live my life now...

thelioncub
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:21 pm
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Re: Saying No.

Postby thelioncub » Sun Jan 06, 2013 2:06 pm

Good luck!

Saying no is very hard, but is often the right thing to do - even though it may not feel like it sometimes!
It sounds like your brother has got so used to leaning on you that he has forgotten that he needs to help himself. Anything you can do to make him see this is a positive, although I would fully expect him to lash out at you in the beginning. Just don't let this break you! Remind yourself that he's not angry at you - he's angry at himself and its just coming out directed at you instead.

Is there anything you can do to help him help himself make his own money? (I don't mean like print it himself - haha).. You know.. any work you can suggest, or a plan to save anything he gets now? Or maybe he needs to focus on not spending what he has? Can you encourage him to find another distraction?
Author of the eBook '101 Distractions from Depression' - An easy to follow guide on how to overcome depression and self-harm.
Only £3.08 and half the proceeds are donated to SANE.
http://www.sane.org.uk/resources/publications/books

stressed
Posts: 231
Joined: Tue May 24, 2011 8:59 pm

Re: Saying No.

Postby stressed » Sun Jan 06, 2013 8:58 pm

Thanks for the reply. I did it! I didn't feel great about saying No, but I did it.

thelioncub
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:21 pm
Contact:

Re: Saying No.

Postby thelioncub » Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:16 pm

Yay! Well done! That's great news.
Do you feel better now for doing it? How did he react? Hope you can keep up the strength - It's always tricky where money is concerned, but you've done the right thing.
:)
Author of the eBook '101 Distractions from Depression' - An easy to follow guide on how to overcome depression and self-harm.
Only £3.08 and half the proceeds are donated to SANE.
http://www.sane.org.uk/resources/publications/books


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