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Nowhere to turn

For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
poppy11
Posts: 5
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2020 9:41 pm

Nowhere to turn

Postby poppy11 » Sun Apr 19, 2020 9:55 pm

Hi I dont know where to start.....

I've been in a relationship for nearly 6 years we argue all the time. I dont get any genuine affection. I'm difficult to love I am aware of that. I'm too hard to love. Everything is difficult and everything he does irritates me. We are not intimate. From early on I knew this wasnt working but he convinced me he would change.... still waiting. I'm really frustrated and now stuck in this uncertain place cos of lock down ...... I dont know what to do.

I have issues...I saw my uncle die tragically in front of me when I was 15, several family members who I was extremely close to have died of cancer. My dad and aunt committed suicide and I dont know why. I've never had therapy. I have a fear of losing people but at the same time i push people away. I'm not close to anyone. I tell my bf when I'm struggling and he doesnt offer comfort or support. I then hold things in and have a melt down at the slightest thing.....am I mad? Is this normal or am I insane.....I feel like I'm insane and get made to feel like this so it must be true right?

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so sad
Posts: 242
Joined: Tue Mar 11, 2008 1:28 pm

Re: Nowhere to turn

Postby so sad » Mon Apr 20, 2020 9:13 am

Hi

Have you ever spoken to your GP about it? I really do think you would benefit from counselling/therapy for everything you've been through - which is a lot. Your GP would be the starting point for support.

I'm so sorry you've been through such a lot. I'm not surprised you are feeling the way you are.

xxx

poppy11
Posts: 5
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2020 9:41 pm

Re: Nowhere to turn

Postby poppy11 » Mon Apr 20, 2020 9:12 pm

I spoke to my GP about it a few years ago they said I had post traumatic anxiety or something. Which I know is true and I was told to contact Cruse. It had a long waiting list and it's not just the suicides and deaths its everything. Work stresses me, things not being just so stressed me, public places, people everything freaks me out.

I dont want to go to counselling. I dont understand what I am feeling or csnt really explain it properly.

I just want to feel better and not be horrible to people close to me

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so sad
Posts: 242
Joined: Tue Mar 11, 2008 1:28 pm

Re: Nowhere to turn

Postby so sad » Tue Apr 21, 2020 8:35 am

Hi

I've had a lot of therapy over the years but it was only when I learnt (through the therapy) to work out what my feelings and emotions were, that I could start to work on them.

Most people, entering therapy, have no idea what it is they are feeling and it takes a lot of work to be able to identify them. Only then, can you work on managing them and making them less of an obstacle on your life. You can learn skills on how to make them less painful but you will need help (professional) to do that.

I strongly recommend speaking to your GP about counselling. I know its nerve-wracking but it will be worth it.

xxx

prycejosh1987
Posts: 246
Joined: Sat Jul 18, 2020 3:30 pm

Re: Nowhere to turn

Postby prycejosh1987 » Sun Jul 19, 2020 1:51 pm

The best thing to do is carry walking even after seeing things dropping in front of you. You have somewhere to turn and that is to your partner.


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