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*Trigg*Calming The bad thoughts of the Child.

For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
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Re: Calming The bad thoughts of the Child.

Postby PureFrustr8d » Wed Apr 23, 2014 12:39 am

Troppus whilst I appreciate you have an opinion on why I posted my questions to Andre, I'd invite you to show some respect and not invalidate my feelings or second guess them. I've been using this site for over 6 years and it's kinda hard not to talk about the elephant in the room if you catch my drift. I've wanted to put that post up for over a week but had the thoughts for longer. Just because you don't care and it doesn't make you feel uncomfortable doesn't mean everyone else is the same. My post makes you feel uncomfortable, I'm not going to question that...if you say it does then it does. I said sorry if the post is unwelcome already knowing others would read it. I also said in a previous post Andre was an asset to the board because of some of his advice but I can have more than one thought about a person. I questioned 1 member NOT as you stated 'members'.

"The primary function of this mental health forum is to provide a space where mutual support is given and received by anyone affected by mental illness" ...he only gives support, never asks for it and doesn't appear to need it...and does he appear to be 'affected by mental illness' - I don't know, that's why I asked.

EDIT: THIS post was written before your reply Andre...I'm posting this all the same and shall read your comments now.


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Re: Calming The bad thoughts of the Child.

Postby PureFrustr8d » Wed Apr 23, 2014 1:14 am

Frankly I find your parts of your reply insulting. You actually believe I'm questioning you because you are showing kindness? or because I have anxiety or paranoia? I'd say in my post if it was any of these things. No, it's plain and don't have mental health problems and don't need emotional support - that's the reason I'm asking and thinking there is more to you...

Read my other posts, I NEVER reject kindness or words of you are barking up the wrong tree.

The trust comments too: wow...I think you are forgetting I'm an individual. Believe it or not I can trust people, why wouldn't I...if someone has done me wrong that's a different question but if a person has never wronged me then I'll trust them...each person is an individual - it does not make sense for me to judge others based on the actions of another person. I'm not going to change core parts of me for anyone, I can be trusted and I trust others, that will never change.

Since you've gone off on a tangent in your post I'll conclude for myself using what you have written: that you are here to find a purpose in your life by helping others as this makes you feel good. There is no shame in that.


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Re: Calming The bad thoughts of the Child.

Postby AndreR » Wed Apr 23, 2014 7:31 am

Hello PrueFrustr8td

After reading your reply this morning I wasn’t expecting you to respond in this way, but I can see as to why you had done so. I hoped to have answered your questions which I didn’t have too.

Because I believe in truth and openness with a freedom to speak how I feel, I am sorry if you felt insulted, I can assure you it was never my intention. I write with my thoughts not directed at a particular person. I sometimes use the word ‘you’ often as I think through in expressing my view in general.

I had put myself in thought about how if someone could be experiencing paranoia or anxiety could feel a heightened awareness with some of the kind of thoughts similar to what you had expressed concern about.

People who suffer with mental health experience all levels, not everyone wishes to share everything and no disrespects but have to I reject that you could make this assessment and you’re not aware of my life and the experiences that I have gone through, but I have come out stronger, and wiser from them and hoping to help others get through theirs. I still have my days, but have learned to cope through them.

In regard to your thoughts about rejecting kindness, again I was merely expressing how I felt, doesn’t mean to say it is? When I read words I tend to feel them and wanted to express how they felt, It was my observation that I hadn’t been questioned before for offering support and kindness, I felt there was some element of fear behind the words. That’s why I felt it was sad. I didn’t consider how ‘you’ felt and was curious what was driving your thoughts. Apologies if you may have misread my intentions.

Speaking of trust, again it was my overview of life and the experiences from life and working with others of how others may gain some understanding about my views, not that I don’t believe that you don’t trust. yet your initial questioning may contradict this thought.

Finally everyone has a purpose but knows not what. Helping others does bring a sense of good, because if I can help in some way that would benefit others, including yourself why not?. There needs to be more people who offer help to others in life, yet sadly can be seen as unusual and may trigger a sense of threat in some way? This was the sadness I felt in those words. But again they were my feelings.

Thanks for your feedback, still surprised as to how my help can raise questions like this, but still 'we all have reasons and purposes'. I hope in some way the air can be cleared and that I still offer support whenever you need if wished from me. I hold no grudge.

I kind of feel a sense of persecution for offering help?, which is a strange new feeling. I don’t think you may wish to now, but I am curious as to what drove you to think the questions you had?. or maybe that we are totally different people that we may never understand each other fully! but that should not affect supporting.

Anyway. I have to leave for work now. I just wanted to reply so hopefully you didn’t feel anger and frustration over the day.
I hope to have in some way clarified. But I won’t be going into any more explanation, to be able to speak freely is a rare ability in a society we live in, SANE I believe should be and can be a place to do so.

Take care
Do it...Afraid.

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Re: Calming The bad thoughts of the Child.

Postby GrannyV » Wed Apr 23, 2014 9:41 am

I feel a little sad now too. Not sure why but that is just the way I feel having read through everything.

Perhaps everything, that can be, has been explained and it is time to move onwards and upwards.

Love to all
G V x x x x

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Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2008 11:21 pm

Re: Calming The bad thoughts of the Child.

Postby PureFrustr8d » Wed Apr 23, 2014 10:32 am

Andre I appreciate you taking time to once again share your thoughts. At least this time you successfully identified a true feeling of mine - the anger I felt at what you had written. It seems your previous reply was not directed at me but to a wider audience and if you had made that clear I may not have felt the outrage and direct judgement that came from reading it.

I did not doubt that you helped members, nothing suggests otherwise but I find it odd that you are not using the site for your own emotional a way you are though, the replies and appreciation you receive must go a long way to making you feel good about yourself. I asked you because you are different to other post seems rational to me, not paranoid, I didn't suggest anything that was not a possibility...I didn't ask if you were a spy or the police or an alien.... I don't see paranoid thinking in what I wrote nor do I see mistrust...I see a person who has observed your posts noted you don't ask for help or share private thoughts when everyone else here is laid bare.

I made my 'assessment' of you in order to put the shoe on the other foot...because your reply to me was full of assumptions just because I have mental health problems. I'd never in my wildest dreams write to someone on this forum as you did to me using their mental health to make all sorts of stereotypical judgements. I question you therefore I'm paranoid? I have mental health problems therefore I can't accept kindness? or that's it's the anxiety I suffer that's the reason I've asked questions? then to feel 'sad' for me...if you wish to feel sad for a person do it for real reasons, I didn't feel sad writing that. It seems you can't see the trees for the forest, I personally don't know why I wouldn't ask you... I've never asked any other members the questions I've put to you and if you can't see my reasoning then it looks as though we're going to have to agree to disagree on this one. You make the mistake of thinking I'm questioning your kindness but it's not my brain....on this site and in these forums you expect to see all sorts but not a healthy individual who doesn't need support. I'm sorry for you if my mental health problems means you can only look at me one way. Maybe you are projecting your own feelings on to me, I don't know but never mind...

I asked questions, I did not make statements, there is a very big difference. I aim to talk with a person, not to them.

Granny V, I'm really sorry if I've caused you distress. Really though, Andre and I are just two adults having a conversation, their is nothing bad meant from either of us. We are not emotional wrecks :D I don't think he's going to understand me and for that reason I won't be contributing further to this post. I hope that puts you at ease.


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