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Family support

For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
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Family support

Postby ooby » Fri Sep 06, 2013 1:10 am

Do you have good family support? Is it close at hand and fairly readily available?
Do you think family support makes much difference?
The nearest person to me,my eldest step daughter lives about 10k away. Not that far but she is too busy to rely on if support is needed.
Other than that it's a brother and sister who live in London and a youngest step daughter who lives in Wiltshire. There is no one who lives in the immediate area who can just pop round in 20-30 minutes if needed.
My brother and youngest step daughter are the ones i have most contact with -mostly by the phone.

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Re: Family support

Postby judithj » Fri Sep 06, 2013 8:05 am

My family live too far away to be able to give much support: my brother's very busy, my sister has her own problems and Mum's 86. I don't have many friends either, but i do have one friend who comes over regularly once a week for coffee and her son comes over too. I don't know if it would make much difference if family were around as I'd be worried about them seeing how bad things are, hugs xxx

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Re: Family support

Postby robinbird » Fri Sep 06, 2013 9:22 am

As someone who's still loving at home (for now) even then it can feel like you're family arent very supportive. They don't see my mood change, and if they do normally I just get told off for being stroppy, difficult or pedantic. I still hide most of my lows from them but the odd time I have opened up to Mum she's said the wrong things or been more awkward than anything else but I know she's trying to help. My Dad claims to understand and yet continues to shout at me for little reason when I'm on a low which causes me to deteriorate further. His shouting has been a trigger for a long time and Mum's tried to bring it up with him but he'll never change.

In this sense I think I'll be better off living away from home at uni. X
Second star to the right and straight on till morning...

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Re: Family support

Postby roberth » Fri Sep 06, 2013 12:43 pm

Coming from a large family I would say can be a double sided coin, sometimes it great because there are many family members for me but I would have to say only one aunt really understands. Then other times I don't get any time to think for myself because they always need things done and I keep getting roped into things I don't like (makes me have high anxiety) or cant do. I guess it is better to have family/friends and I am not ungrateful, but I could get a lot more done if I was by myself education/work/hobbies.
So you can't hold a star in your hand though
At least you can hold on to another plan

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Re: Family support

Postby scotty1 » Tue Sep 10, 2013 6:30 pm

Ooby, When I was really struggling just over a year ago and could not cope being so far away from my family. I made the decision to up sticks from London and move a long way to be near them.
Like roberth said. It could be a double sided coin at times. But not sure I would have managed without them.

Most don't really understand what happened to me and therefore don't talk about it, apart from one brother.
Right now they all assume I am better!!! Whatever that means.

I am glad for their company when I need it, but I don't depend on it. I have no friends here though so at times it can feel lonely, despite the big extended family.

hope you can keep contact with the family, it does help.

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Re: Family support

Postby lucklifting » Wed Jul 09, 2014 12:47 am

It looks like I'm the only one with no family then - lol

Indeed there are very few with no family on forums like this (or they are all hiding ;) )

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Re: Family support

Postby Lilac1 » Wed Jul 09, 2014 7:59 pm

I have never had much of a family since the age of 11. I fended for self and my sibling sister from that age. So 'close' family is pretty alien to me. No children of my own. I do have mum left (never been close since she left us at the said age. She now resides in abroad. My dad was killed in an RTA, my step-dad of 21 years had a heart attack in Jan this year. I do have distant cousins & aunts, a nan & granddad, but none close...& what used to be 'close' friends...are slowly slipping away, part me & illness, & part everything changes, and is impermanent. ......& so it continues.............!


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