i dont feel really ill

[Lucretia]

thanks belle
xx
1 night is the longest ive been away from my mum recently other than that I cant really manage for longer than 2 to 3 hours at a time
xx
what is stopping me from getting a boyfriend?
I really wish I could tell you ,but I cant talk to you privately
xx
I will just say im not normal im too emotional if he loved me and left me I would die
literally die and I guess it would help if I actually ever left the house to meet one and could actually talk to them myself without needing my mum too be there!
if he left me I would die
and I would worry all the time he was going to leave me ,was too good for me and
im not grown up enough ,its hard to explain if you knew me in RL you would understand ,its difficult when people often assume you are as well at communication/being social in RL as you are online ,I am not.
xx
thanks everyone
xx
sometimes in life it just helps to know somebody cares

[Lucretia]

now im thinking
I feel so bad talking about wanting to die when the soldier was killed last week
sorry
xx

[belle]

Don't beat yourself up Lu.
That was totally tragic - no other words on that atm.
Your struggle is your struggle and life isn't easy for you.
Keep safe and maybe try to distract yourself while you are feeling so low this evening.
xxx

[Lucretia]

xx
will try distract by watching Britain's got talent with mum
would distract more if they had great animal act like Pudsey
xx
thanks everyone who has replied
xx

[toxicmind]

lu your honest about whats on your mind so don't be sorry. you start some good threads which have been a good distraction it would be a waste of a good life if you died no one here wants you dead

[toxicmind]

1 night is the longest ive been away from my mum recently other than that I cant really manage for longer than 2 to 3 hours at a time
xx

could maybe spend another night away from your mum then gradually extent it to another night away?

what is stopping me from getting a boyfriend?
I really wish I could tell you ,but I cant talk to you privately

having no pm system seems to of cause a lot of distress

I will just say im not normal im too emotional if he loved me and left me I would die
literally die and I guess it would help if I actually ever left the house to meet one and could actually talk to them myself without needing my mum too be there!
if he left me I would die
and I would worry all the time he was going to leave me ,was too good for me and
im not grown up enough ,its hard to explain if you knew me in RL you would understand ,its difficult when people often assume you are as well at communication/being social in RL as you are online ,I am not.

i think your very normal maybe your emotional because you care about your mum and people why do you need your mum around when you meet someone ?

[Lucretia]

because she stops people from hurting me
xx

[belle]

How do you feel now Lu?
xxx

[Lucretia]

the same mostly
xx
but all of you have helped because I don't feel so alone
xx
I try and protect mum so I don't cry in front of her and avoid telling her bad things because I want her to have a good worry free life
xx
im so grateful to have somewhere to come where I can tell the truth of how im feeling
xx

[toxicmind]

how does your mum stop them from hurting you lu? sorry if that a stupid question but how will you find if a bf is right for you if your mum is stepping in? no disrespect to you or your mum?