i dont feel really ill

[belle]

Hey what's up Lu?
xxx

[belle]

I'm sorry you feel so sad and low today.
That yearning feeling of the way your (one's) life goes and the things you really want and maybe can't have can make some days very, very hard.
It's no good saying you have to exist for other people because you need to exist for yourself too if that makes sense.
Selfishly, but probably speaking for lots of people on here, we don't want you to end your life.
You have so many good qualities which you probably don't even recognise.
Please try to treat yourself kindly while you are feeling like this.
((xx))

[judithj]

maybe this is an after effect of your migraine, hugs, Judith xxx

[toxicmind]

what grown up things do you want lu and why can't you have them? whats dramatic about telling people whats on your mind weather thats saying you want to die or your angry,sad,happy or lucky thats not dramatic thats honesty

[toxicmind]

maybe you can in the future what the longest period of time you have been away from your mum whats stopping you from getting a bf?

[belle]

Maybe you need to 'mourn' for the relationship you have never had with your dad?
I don't have any ideas as to how but maybe you could talk to your MH team about it?
I suppose the divorce going through has triggered this loss to the fore front of your mind, and the fact that you have not received what should be a 'right' for all children.
However, sadly RL isn't like that - never has been, is or will be for many children. How I wish that was so different.
Keep safe and look after yourself.
xxx

[belle]

Don't beat yourself up Lu.
That was totally tragic - no other words on that atm.
Your struggle is your struggle and life isn't easy for you.
Keep safe and maybe try to distract yourself while you are feeling so low this evening.
xxx

[toxicmind]

lu your honest about whats on your mind so don't be sorry. you start some good threads which have been a good distraction it would be a waste of a good life if you died no one here wants you dead

[toxicmind]

1 night is the longest ive been away from my mum recently other than that I cant really manage for longer than 2 to 3 hours at a time
xx

could maybe spend another night away from your mum then gradually extent it to another night away?

what is stopping me from getting a boyfriend?
I really wish I could tell you ,but I cant talk to you privately

having no pm system seems to of cause a lot of distress

I will just say im not normal im too emotional if he loved me and left me I would die
literally die and I guess it would help if I actually ever left the house to meet one and could actually talk to them myself without needing my mum too be there!
if he left me I would die
and I would worry all the time he was going to leave me ,was too good for me and
im not grown up enough ,its hard to explain if you knew me in RL you would understand ,its difficult when people often assume you are as well at communication/being social in RL as you are online ,I am not.

i think your very normal maybe your emotional because you care about your mum and people why do you need your mum around when you meet someone ?

[belle]

How do you feel now Lu?
xxx