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Avalon
Posts: 1247
Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2012 5:32 pm

Re: cancer

Postby Avalon » Sat May 12, 2012 10:48 am

Oh rj, i'm so sorry you are dealing with this huge worry. When does your mum have to go?

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judithj
Posts: 22771
Joined: Fri Feb 29, 2008 5:25 pm
Location: Have you ever thought what it's like, to be wanderers in the fourth dimension?

Re: cancer

Postby judithj » Sat May 12, 2012 11:07 am

going to the appointment hasn't made her have cancer - and being called back doesn't mean she has cancer either. because of her history they'll be very careful and want to check thoroughly anything unusual they find. they just want to be certain, that's all. even if there is anything that needs treating, the sooner they treat it the better. i know you're worried, but try not to assume the worst - you need to have more information before you can be sure of anything, hugs, Judith xxx

belle
Posts: 5410
Joined: Sat Nov 19, 2011 11:20 pm

Re: cancer

Postby belle » Sat May 12, 2012 2:29 pm

Hello rj.
I'm sorry your mum has had this letter.
It may just be the hospital being cautious and double checking.
I know how much your mum means to you, but perhaps try not to jump to conclusions until you know the full picture? Easier said than done, I know.
Whatever happens, going to the last appointment would not make anything happen.
Thinking about you.
Look after yourself rj.
xx

umbrella4therain
Posts: 2829
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2008 1:48 pm

Re: cancer

Postby umbrella4therain » Sat May 12, 2012 4:51 pm

Sorry to hear you are feeling so bad rj and about your mums letter. Although it must be worrying try to remember if there is something there its good that they have spotted it. I agree with the others though they maybe being cautious because of her history.

i knew if she went for her appointment it would make her have it
Remember RJ this is your OCD talking. That isnt true. Going for the appointment means if there was anything there they can catch and treat it.

Please take care rj. I know this must be really difficult for you. Try to find ways to relax.
Ive been meaning to tell you, my CPN recommended a book its called "Brain lock, free yourself from obssessive compulsive behaviour." A four step treatment to change your brain chemistry. by Jeffrey M Schwarts with Beverly Beyette.

I posted these links on another thread but hopefully they might help.

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/anxiety_self_help.htm

http://www.patient.co.uk/health/Anxiety ... -Guide.htm

http://www.rd.com/health/37-stress-management-tips/

http://www.managinganxiety.co.uk/

Be kind to yourself RJ its understandable to feel worried. Please take care of yourself, find ways to relax and keep telling us how you are. xxx

belle
Posts: 5410
Joined: Sat Nov 19, 2011 11:20 pm

Re: cancer

Postby belle » Sat May 12, 2012 5:52 pm

Hi rj.
Sounds like you are doing very well in such a difficult situation.
Yes, weekends feel more 'unsafe' to me too.
We are here for you, so keep posting and let us know how you are.
xx

Aleshadxcherylc
Posts: 1202
Joined: Tue Jan 03, 2012 8:28 pm

Re: cancer

Postby Aleshadxcherylc » Sat May 12, 2012 8:07 pm

Hi RJ
So sorry to hear about your mum
I know how devestating cancer can be as it runs in my family so i understand your anxiety
So sorry i cant say much it must be a scary awful situation for you
but we are all here for you
Katie
xx
And the tears come streaming down your face,when you lose something you cant replace
Till now, I always got by on my own, I never really cared until I met you
No-one ever comes close to you

umbrella4therain
Posts: 2829
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2008 1:48 pm

Re: cancer

Postby umbrella4therain » Sat May 12, 2012 11:28 pm

keep letting us know how you are rj. you dont have to hold it all in. xxx

Avalon
Posts: 1247
Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2012 5:32 pm

Re: cancer

Postby Avalon » Sun May 13, 2012 3:50 pm

rj you're not being a baby at all. It's a terrifying thought that your mum may be unwell.
I completely understand your fears, my mum recently died and she was quite young.
Also my partner has had cancer already and it's one of my biggest fears that it will return.
Don't be hard on yourself but try not to predict the future either. It has nothing to do with anything you've done. Promise. Although i get the thinking behind that.
keep posting rj we're all rooting for you and your mum xx

umbrella4therain
Posts: 2829
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2008 1:48 pm

Re: cancer

Postby umbrella4therain » Sun May 13, 2012 4:05 pm

Rj I know the fear of losing your mum is massive. You have in no way caused this and you do not know yet if it has returned. Its your OCD trying to tell you that you are responsible and it's not true.

Rj you can get through this. I know the anxiety for you would be very difficult for you to manage if you found out your mum had cancer but you would be able to find other ways through it, suicide would not be your only option.

Try to focus on the here and now if you can. Worrying about the outcome of these tests and going over and over it in your head is not going to help anyone or change anything. You are not responsible for this. Find ways to try to help yourself relax and dont feel guilty for relaxing. Sending you a hug. I know this is hard but you can get through it. xxxx

Avalon
Posts: 1247
Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2012 5:32 pm

Re: cancer

Postby Avalon » Mon May 14, 2012 4:52 pm

How you doing??? xxx


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