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Feeling crappy

For sharing your experiences and feelings about mental illness
siriusbinary
Posts: 1147
Joined: Mon Nov 09, 2009 10:19 pm
Location: South East England

Feeling crappy

Postby siriusbinary » Mon Aug 29, 2011 4:55 am

Feeling like sh*t.

Over the last two months had started to get quite close to a chap and thought it might of been the beginnings of something special. He's very quiet and I'm quite chatty so it wasn't all smooth sailing. He was very quiet with me immediately prior to my gall bladder coming out and really has been quite withdrawn over last couple of weeks. He said it was due to being busy at work.

We met up over the weekend. In conversation I directly asked him if he was still motivated to spend time with me and he said he wasn't sure :(

He said he would think about it and let me know.

Because this is the first time I have allowed myself to even like anyone since my marriage broke down 4 odd years ago I feel like I have been a complete fool. I wonder if there really is anything about me that will ever make anyone think I am loveable again.

My confidence and self-esteem have just completely dropped through the floor again. I think I am more fragile than I thought - I'd had it in my head I was doing so well, so positive but now I am starting to wonder if I have been tricking myself.

What a sh*tty, sh*tty way to spend a bank holiday.
:cry:
Wag more, bark less x

Treloarbabe
Posts: 1012
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 9:59 pm

Re: Feeling crappy

Postby Treloarbabe » Mon Aug 29, 2011 8:12 am

sorry you are going through the mill! You are fine just the way you are! There is no need to hurt your lovely self! Don't do it please love! Flick an elastic band or punch a pillow maybe instead! Shout, scream, cry - I'll listen! You've really helped me this morning! XX

At least this guy sounds honest I suppose! He's not just taking you for a ride! There will be someone out there for you babe - just wait patiently!

Thank you for all your support!

pixie.
Posts: 60
Joined: Wed Aug 17, 2011 2:02 pm

Re: Feeling crappy

Postby pixie. » Mon Aug 29, 2011 3:14 pm

Hi H,
Sorry to hear about your relationship problems.
If I can help or give you any advice from from a blokes point of view, then I'm here as you have given me some good support and advice when I first joined the boards.
I have had a bit of a knock back last week but managed to get into a respite center for a week as I was not too good,to say the least.
Hope you are ok.

Pixie xx

siriusbinary
Posts: 1147
Joined: Mon Nov 09, 2009 10:19 pm
Location: South East England

Re: Feeling crappy

Postby siriusbinary » Mon Aug 29, 2011 5:31 pm

Hi Pixie,

glad you managed to get yourself some support when you needed it - it will help in the long term. How are you getting along now?

Thanks for the offer to *try* and help me get why this chap has behaved like he has - but as I have realized just how easily wounded I am I think it is best I just resign it to being a bit of a painful learning experience.

Maybe one day I will meet mr right! lol

Hx
Wag more, bark less x

tracie
Posts: 1508
Joined: Thu Jul 01, 2010 2:39 pm

Re: Feeling crappy

Postby tracie » Mon Aug 29, 2011 5:56 pm

sorry you feeling crappy not so good myself mr right will come along hunni be kind to you and keep safe x

carebear
Posts: 871
Joined: Fri Oct 01, 2010 7:26 pm
Location: North West

Re: Feeling crappy

Postby carebear » Mon Aug 29, 2011 10:01 pm

Hugs H

You are not alone. I am also one of those who is still waiting for Mr Right to come along! It does get you down thou wondering when it will happen. It will, just have to wait for the right one.

Carebear x

siriusbinary
Posts: 1147
Joined: Mon Nov 09, 2009 10:19 pm
Location: South East England

Re: Feeling crappy

Postby siriusbinary » Tue Aug 30, 2011 12:23 pm

I think i have just been thrown but how his rejection has affected me.

I used to be very strong and logical and think 'if he doesn't want me then he can't be the right one for me' and would move on with life straight away without beating myself up.

But since I have had depression I have found I am more vumerable and take rejection far more personally. It makes me feel a bit helpless and just a bit pathetic.

It makes me feel quite scared about opening up to or entertaining the idea of meeting someone again. That's not how I want to be.

Down in the dumps today.

Hx
Wag more, bark less x

mending_wings
Posts: 498
Joined: Sun Aug 21, 2011 8:19 pm
Location: East Anglia

Re: Feeling crappy

Postby mending_wings » Tue Aug 30, 2011 12:48 pm

Hi H

I totally get where you're coming from. I haven't had a relationship with anyone for about 5-6 years and jus recently started seeing someone who i quite like. But then when i told him just a little bit about being ill and then got signed off work the next week, i've hardly heard from him and when i text him, i get no reply. It hurts so much when you feel that you're finally prepared to try and let someone in only for them to decide that they're not as interested as you thought they were.

Hope you're ok and find some way to get through this and trust someone again in the future, as the others have said, Mr Right is out there somewhere. Sadly finding him can be a painful experience!

Emma
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long


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