I totally get what you're saying about relationships. I was in them for most of my adult life, since 15. I've been kind of single for a year and half now and I have hated it, but I made myself do it, thinking I had to learn I can do it on my own, and yes, I've learnt that, but I already knew it so really I wasted that time being lonely. I also allowed an ex to use me in that 1 1/2 years, which made getting over him extremely difficult. Saying no to him just wasn't an option all those times.
I think being in a loving relationship maybe key to finding happyness, but it has to be a good relationship for it to work. I'm gonna look for that now & not settle for anything less.
Maybe we shouldn't be looking for reasons why anymore, and like you say accept it for what it is & move onto the next chapter.
I'm on UC too & it really is the pits. Nowhere near enough to live on. Debts are chasing me too, even took money direct from my wages & UC. Apparently they can do that & is worked out on a percentage. One month they took £90 from my £490 UC payment. It's so damaging & makes you feel like you can't cope anymore.
Theres this thing called a DRO if you've not heard of it look into it. It's a Debt Relief Order, you pay a fee and it puts all your debts on hold for 12 months, If your circumstances don't change in that time it wipes them. I need to do it, but can't afford the fee yet.
Also you mention being a carer for your daughter. Can you not get a carers allowance for that ?
You've done quite a few worthwhile courses there.
Have you heard of the 19+ loan? You can do a level 3 upwards with it & won't have to pay it back until you're earning £25000 a year.
You could also try a "Go fund me page" to try and raise the money to start a business.
Accept it. Change it. Leave it.. If you Can't Change it, Leave it
so very true and I love the way you put that crying won't change anything !! It doesn't.
I don't think its a hate thing about your ex, he just couldn't face you. Some people just are like that & they run away from things. We could analyse it in so many ways, but you may not ever know the truth, its a hard thing to move on from but we have too or we'll become stuck in the torture. You do deserve better, as do I and as do so many people out there, we need to accept that & not settle for anything less. We can make that choice and if its wrong, change it again.
Tommys so right, we should not feel bad for giving someone our heart (metaphorically of course) and we shouldn't not give it to the next person because it was broken before..