This is my first post. I joined due to an ongoing problem with my marriage. I suppose I’m not looking for advice, just a place to vent my anger, frustration and sadness.
About 6 months ago, my husband was unfaithful (we have only been married 2 years). We spent some time apart and decided that we both wanted to be together. I specified that things needed to change in order for this to be the case- things like honesty, affection etc.
Since then, we’ve been having good times together and trying to spend more time together and going on dates. However, I’ve always felt that I have to be immediately ok with the past situation and I’m not allowed to talk about it.
This weekend, husband went on a stag do. He knew I was feeling anxious about him going away and the type of laddish behaviour that goes on. Me being this emotional, neurotic person checks his laptop as his photos sync to it. I see photos of him holding a girl’s hand talking closely to her. I see a video of him wasted saying “she wants my d”. I see a video of his friend saying to him “get your d out for ***”(name of person he was unfaithful with). He also told me just now that he was sharing a room with the one lad in the group that he has kissed before and has a bit of a crush on (a different person who he told me he’d be sharing with).
Im so angry, upset and hurt. I know he hasn’t been unfaithful again, but all of these things are still hurtful towards me. When I brought this up with him he said “I’ve tried and I’ve been good”. But in my eyes, this isn’t being good. That isn’t what a husband should do in my eyes and I feel like he’s not being very thoughtful about my feelings.
Am I just being emotional and over the top?