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by andthistoomustpass
Wed Sep 09, 2020 1:36 am
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

Diary Entry 1 September It hasn't been a great few days and I am posting this a few hours before dawn, so still not great. I've not exercised since Friday. Despair is creeping in to my thoughts, like a stale fart creeping into my sinuses. I have been reinforcing thoughts of what I never had as a chi...
by andthistoomustpass
Thu Aug 27, 2020 2:26 pm
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

The abject loneliness and the sense of being fundamentally different and not belonging anywhere, cut right to the heart of it. Heavy stuff!
by andthistoomustpass
Thu Aug 27, 2020 2:23 pm
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

Diary Entry 26/08/20 It can probably be put down to multiple things, and certainly follows a lot of self help and therapy, but right now I feel the foundation pillars of my self damaging outlook and behaviours are falling one after another, like huge dominoes :) This post is to note another of my un...
by andthistoomustpass
Mon Aug 24, 2020 7:17 pm
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

Diary Entry Sunday, 23/08 It's been coming and going like the tide but angry again today, feeling like I matter again. I do matter! I did matter! I was failed and abused by those who should have nurtured and protected me. I owe them fk all. They deserve pain and loss! This feels good, but anger is t...
by andthistoomustpass
Sun Aug 16, 2020 4:13 pm
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

Reminder of my favourite quote from Dr David Burns "Then how can I develop a sense of self esteem" you may ask. The answer is - you don't have to! You don't have to do anything especially worthy to create or deserve self esteem; all you have to do is turn off that critical, haranguing inne...
by andthistoomustpass
Sun Aug 16, 2020 4:11 pm
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

My good mood following the above post has continued, anger at those who stole the first half of my life from me and valuing myself go hand in hand. Anxiety is still ready to pop it's head out at every opportunity. Valuing myself slays one head of the Cerberus, fear of other people is the other head....
by andthistoomustpass
Sun Aug 16, 2020 4:10 pm
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

ericph wrote:I did say at the bottom of my reply to ignore this if it is not for you.

I hope you are able to find peace with all your thoughts.

Take care
Eric

I wish you would stay off my diary thread.
by andthistoomustpass
Fri Aug 14, 2020 10:42 am
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

Hi Eric Thanks for replying but I disagree with almost everything you have said. What suits you doesn't suit me. Anger can be a good thing, something to be nurtured. The whole forgiveness thing may well suit some people, often I suspect people strive to forgive because of religious and societal expe...
by andthistoomustpass
Fri Aug 14, 2020 12:58 am
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

I've made quicker progress on my 4 August post than I thought possible. It links in to when I did CBT in 2014 and identified that a core belief was that I am a burden on all those around me, that I am not good enough. That core belief finally shifted in counselling on Tuesday. I now feel that I am g...
by andthistoomustpass
Mon Aug 10, 2020 5:08 am
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack
Replies: 513
Views: 323417

Re: Emotional resilience and the impact of its lack

Sunday 9 August Been unsettled for a few days. I think it is because a book has knocked some thoughts loose. Reading cptsd from surviving to thriving. I went from dismissing the section on the four Fs to being stongly affected. Want to reread. Monday 10 August It is not my job to please other people...

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