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by myheadspacerace
Tue May 26, 2020 11:19 pm
Forum: Safe Room
Topic: When will this end?
Replies: 1
Views: 1211

When will this end?

I am a schizophrenic with depression and was diagnosed in 1999. Over the years my history has been brought down to a few disparaging words. No matter how I try to explain there is so much more that goes to my story. I do not know where to turn as every new turn brings a new problem. I feel a loss of...
by myheadspacerace
Tue Feb 25, 2020 3:19 am
Forum: Mutual Support Group
Topic: I do not want to be here anymore
Replies: 7
Views: 1039

Re: I do not want to be here anymore

Sorry to hear of your situation. I too have had suicidal thoughts, thinking it would be best to succumb to the impulses. I have tried more than once but I do believe it will get better. The dark places we sometimes find ourselves in. I have found samaritans and the sane help line helpful. I use the ...
by myheadspacerace
Tue Feb 25, 2020 2:09 am
Forum: Creative Corner
Topic: Wanderlust
Replies: 0
Views: 2039

Wanderlust

Green as green was the grass he saw, Blue was the sky, so blue, so blue, The hills inviting, the valleys delighting, One day far away, in mind and underfoot, Nothing was wanted to be understood, The shades of promise, swiftly taken away, The clocks they change, they never stop, But somehow I have fo...
by myheadspacerace
Mon Feb 24, 2020 11:28 pm
Forum: Creative Corner
Topic: Wings of change
Replies: 0
Views: 1023

Wings of change

Why am I? Is it my illness?, Who am I? sometimes It surprises me, Where am I? in the shade, Where was I? in the darkness. Where am I going? On to a new destination, What's the reason? hope given, Where did I find this? From someone who listened, So for those that try, That listen not judge, You are ...
by myheadspacerace
Mon Feb 24, 2020 9:33 pm
Forum: Creative Corner
Topic: Girlfriend
Replies: 0
Views: 1094

Girlfriend

I'd like to have girlfriend, Someone to hold my hand, Being lonely so long, For this was never planned, I know there are kind women, The kind I'd like to meet, But because of my situation, I cant bring myself to speak, I try to say a word or two, As one woman passes in the street, Nut nothing will c...
by myheadspacerace
Mon Feb 24, 2020 8:27 pm
Forum: Creative Corner
Topic: On my knees
Replies: 0
Views: 922

On my knees

I try to take a step
But every step I take
There seems only to be
someone there hating me
So once again bended on one knee
Where people keep putting me
no friend to say
Its going to be okay
So when the night is here
As I cry another tear inside
I wish
I wish I had someplace to hide
by myheadspacerace
Sun Jan 05, 2020 10:17 pm
Forum: Safe Room
Topic: ChristmasGrinch --TRIGGER--
Replies: 0
Views: 802

ChristmasGrinch --TRIGGER--

So, I am a schizophrenic and suffer from depression. So, this Christmas I was going to spend some time with my Dad and my brother and his gf. Looking forward to arriving by bus, it all started to go downhill. As the hours progressed the insults flowed, passive aggressive and in between conversation....
by myheadspacerace
Sat Nov 16, 2019 12:17 am
Forum: Rant Room
Topic: alcohol (trigger warning)
Replies: 0
Views: 2486

alcohol (trigger warning)

I have had a few beers. Getting taunted by my neighbours. I want to confront them but they are silent. My life in my hands is fragile. No thought is safe. I will stand strong. I will stand my ground. You do not matter. I am more than you. I will not be beaten. Your lies will not control me. You will...
by myheadspacerace
Fri Nov 15, 2019 8:26 pm
Forum: Safe Room
Topic: Friday
Replies: 0
Views: 2038

Friday

A few beers down, listening to some music on YouTube. Had a shitty day. The usual. But I feel ok right now. I am not sure what it is that makes me feel like this. Yes the alcohol could be but I usually feel like shit with the hangover from hell, the one where you cant get yourself out of bed. If tha...
by myheadspacerace
Mon Nov 11, 2019 8:32 am
Forum: Safe Room
Topic: Monday
Replies: 0
Views: 1950

Monday

Another night awake, hoping to get some relief from the incessant harassment from my neighbours and random strangers, not so random anymore but faceless as I try to focus on Uni and other things. Stronger now, maybe that's because of a less stressful and demanding schedule or that I have become used...

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